Wednesday, February 3, 2010

Taking a stance

So sorry its been a few days. I had my up north trip, which was great but really I just want to talk about a part that almost ruined it for me. On the 2nd night we went to the bar. When I say we it was me and 4 other people all at least 20 years older than me, it was a kind of family trip. Anywho, I went because I didn't want to stay in the condo with kids all 10 years or more younger then me, plus liquor usually makes the night more fun no matter who you are with. NOT IN THIS CASE. So I spent most of the night not really getting involved with the conversation because 1, I'm not old, and 2, the XGames were on, and it was the superpipe, and I wanted to see Shaun White take the gold yet again. After the XGames were over I started to become more involved, they made me get on the dancefloor and participate, I obliged them, felt like an idiot but I did it anyway. Then one of the mothers that was up decided that she needed to be all up on this drummer of the band. Who my mother informed me had the hots for her BUT he was married. She knew it, everyone knew it, yet she still pursued it. Now coming from a father who cheated on my mother for 15 years I don't take to that kind of stuff very kindly. But I kept my mouth shut because I didn't want to make waves. I did however try to be a cock block but she was NOT having it and she shooed me away. So cut to later the conversation turned to how the guy who owns the condo, a real ass who I've never liked, talking about some lesbian weekend that he was unaware of and how he kept inviting them to his bonfire and had no clue. He was of course being himself which was slightly offensive but since I've known him forever it was tolerable. The conversation was coming to a close and the WHORE (woman who was trying to take home the married man) decided to throw out this lovely comment.... Ohhhh I feel sooooo bad for those children (kids of the lesbians), they have to have the most horrible life, its just so disgusting (being gay), they (gay people) shouldn't be allowed to have children. Now me having had a few too many to drink and have had the most wonderful gay people come in and out of my life and have meant so much to me including a cousin who means the world to me, I naturally LIT OFF LIKE A FIRECRACKER at this woman. I haven't been that mad at a single person in so long. I have not witnessed such hate spew out of someone's mouth so carelessly like it is something they talk about on a daily basis. I am still in utter shock. Now I'm not gay, so all you gays out there that have experienced this I am sorry for seeming so naive. I just like in Jen world, and in Jen world everyone is accepted and I love all (that don't cross me) equally. The asshole who owns the condo tried jumping into the convo but no one had a real argument against me. I pressed buttons by saying, so you all are telling me that kids coming from divorce are better off then kids coming from loving gay parents. Everyone at the table, me excluding, was divorced. The asshole tried yelling at me telling me I didn't know what I was talking about. I come from a real fucked up father, who fucked me up so bad I have the worst issues from my parents divorce. I threw that in his face and it shut him up about the gays (he later brought something up so dumb but has a real knack for screaming at people and making them feel so awful they cry, it happens every trip, it was just my turn and I ended up leaving the bar to cry myself to sleep) Its true I did cry myself to sleep. But it was mostly because of the hatred. And that my mom sat there and said nothing. Which I did learn the next morning she yelled at everyone and made the whore apologize and admit she was wrong. She may have just said that because she then realized she was outnumbered, but I really hope she opens her eyes up and stops hating. OMG, I just want to go out there and help the fight to get gays back their right to marry and their basic rights back. I just don't even know where to begin. I'm just so sickened to have had to be faced with such hatred. Everyone I surround myself with is not like that, I realize I live in a bubble, but my bubble is amazing and filled with love. My God doesn't hate, my God loves. The whore tried bringing up religion. WRONG person to be bringing up religion with. Religion is a belief, being gay is real its not a belief. Beliefs are to be kept seperate from state... if you recall separation of CHURCH and STATE. UGH. People are so awful. Just because you don't believe in being gay doesn't mean they don't exist, doesn't mean that YOU get to decide what they can and can't do. Let everyone live their life. And the whole crap about its not natural. Who says its not. Yes science says that only a man and woman can procreate... but science never said people aren't gay. So what if they can't NATURALLY procreate. Really all they have to do is go to a bar let some guy do them and BAM, kid. Or a guy can adopt, or a guy can pretend to be straight knock up a girl and BAM, kid. Just because people can naturally have kids, doesn't mean being straight is natural to them. Wanting to be a parent, and wanting to raise someone with the person you choose to love is such a great thing. Why deny anyone that joy? Why deny some poor orphan the chance of having a home, having two people to love them unconditionally? I just can't be around people who don't answer any of my questions the same way I would, or the same way someone not filled with hatred would.

Ugh.... look there i go getting all furious again. This subject has just touched me to my soul and I want to make sure that some how I make a difference. Whether or not I become a surrogate for my gay friends someday, or I start helping to get these dumb laws changed. I will make a difference and be proud that I helped equality.

Love Fully.